When my daughter was little, certain relatives used to complain how she didn’t seem to like them very much. Now, clearly, the expectation was, as parents, her father and I would somehow fix it. Would force her to like them, as was our duty and their due.
Evidently, “huh, well, have you tried being more likable?” wasn’t the right answer.
Except, you know what? It was.
It may not have been the most polite or diplomatic answer, it was not the answer they wanted. But it WAS right, and true.
They felt entitled to have her feel and behave toward them in a particular way, regardless of their own attitudes and behavior. Whether they’d earned it or not, they felt they deserved it, were owed it.
Because, reasons. Because, family.
Because, bullshit. You can’t dictate, command, or demand those things from another person.
So, the “don’t be an ass” thing? It’s advice. Advice. A suggestion. It’s not a rule, not an order, not a law.
You might think that something so simple and basic would be, well, simple and basic, kind of obvious. I mean, duh, right? Not something to draw a lot of protest and pushback and backlash. Who would argue with something so fundamental?
Asses, mostly.
Asses for whom assdom is a lifestyle choice, who maybe have little else going for them, little else to hold onto. Who revel in their assdom and are all too glad to lash out at any perceived attack, slight, or threat upon it.
Honestly, why should you have to examine your own attitudes and behavior when it’s everyone else’s reactions that are the real issue? All these intolerant-against-assdom so-called liberal cuck virtue-signaling snowflakes buzzword whatever?
If you’re happy being an ass, if it’s working for you, if it’s getting you the results you want, then by all means, carry on. Nobody’s stopping you. Nobody CAN stop you. There’s no Ass Police, no legal or governmental authorities.
Drawback: there’s also no law saying other people have to put up with it; they can’t be forced to socialize with you, work with you, interact with you on a personal or business level. And, brace yourself because this may be a shock, it isn’t even censorship!
“But but but free speech!” Absolutely. Go ahead and say anything you want, knock yourself out.
“But but but free speech and everybody HAS to listen to meeee!” Bzzt. Nope. Everybody gets to decide for themselves if they want to or not.
“But but but free speech and nobody can say anything back or criticize me!” Bzzt. Nope again. Two-way street there, chumley.
“But but but you’re bullying meeee!” Bzzt. Third strike; on Family Feud we’d kick it over to the other team now.
Bonus round: Bullying is different, and you know it. But “mocking” doesn’t play as well into the persecutory victimhood ideation as well, does it?
Okay, now we’re getting into some upper-division assdom, the really pro levels, the asses who might build their entire identities around such perceived injustices.
Going back to the basic premise, if you want to be liked, try being more likable. Instead of, y’know, railing against everyone else for only liking the likable people.
It’s like when the creepy dude complains about girls finding him creepy, and someone suggests he maybe not do (creepything), and he sulks because girls should just stop thinking (creepything) is creepy.
Hey, it’s advice; all anybody can do is offer suggestions. You gotta do what works for you.
Maybe you don’t want to change your behavior. Maybe you’re deeply invested in your assdom, maybe it really IS all you have to define yourself and hold onto.
Ask yourself, though … IS it working for you? IS it getting you the results you want? What results DO you want?
If the results you want involve clippetyclopping along being an ass, hey, go for it. Not that you need my or anybody else’s permission. Remember, it’s not a rule, not a law. Just advice.
If the results you want involve clippetyclopping along being an ass without any social consequence or repercussion, well, that’s where you’re going to clippetyclop your way right into a wall, because of that whole matter of others being able to make their own decisions and stuff having consequences.
You have every right to be an ass. Others have every right not to like you for being one. Which still won’t stop you, if you’re a really dug-in, dedicated, and determined ass.
I believe in you.
